I’m not sure I was any better. I had just been divorced a year previous from the woman who I was expecting to spend the rest of my life with. I worked from home and lived in the suburbs with a huge back yard. It was time to have a family.

I knew that I would need to step up and be the pack leader for these two dogs if there was any chance of us leaving the house. They, like people, needed a leader they could look up to and respect. Said respect wasn’t granted right away. I had to earn it. I had to prove to them I was fit to be their pack leader.

Those two dogs taught me more about leadership than any book on the subject. Here are some examples:

Anger is perceived as weakness.

Dog’s don’t emote like people do. This is a common misconception. People think, “Oh, don’t do that it’ll hurt my dog’s feelings.” Or “If I yell and spank my dog three hours after he’s gotten into the trash, he’ll put two-and-two together and learn from his mistake.” This can’t be farther from the truth.

Dogs pick up on and communicate through energy. Ever notice how your dog knows when you’re upset, or when you’re feeling bad? They’re reading the energy you’re giving off. Anger is bad energy and it’s an emotion that dogs don’t understand. To them it’s weakness and they won’t respect it. A pack leader remains calm under pressure and doesn’t let his emotions get in the way of the task at hand. That’s not to say the leader can’t show emotion. He can, but the temper needs to be kept under control.

Reward good behavior.

It’s amazing how effective positive reinforcement can be. When your dog does a trick, or goes outside to do his business, chances are he gets a treat. He’s rewarded for good behavior and learns to keep it up to keep getting the reward.

Leaders: how do you reward good behavior from your employees and team members? Does it go unnoticed? Do you think it doesn’t matter? I’m not saying throw a party every time a deadline is met, but a “Good job!” or an “Atta boy,” or a “Thanks for all you do,” surprisingly goes a long way. Keeping the staff late because you’re up against a tight deadline for a big project that requires all hands on deck? Offer to buy dinner, or give them an extra hour in the morning. Pour into your employees and they’ll pour back into your company.

Praise in public, criticize in private.

This could roll underneath the above point, but I feel it’s important enough to have it’s own section. Dogs love praise and affection. They love to feel they’re in good standing with their pack leader. When they’re not, they know it because the leader will correct them if they’re out of line.

The pack leader corrects by nipping at their throats. This asserts control and says, “I’m the boss. Stop.” Ever seen those spiky collars that look like a medieval torture device? Pinch collars are used to correct bad behavior. It doesn’t take yelling, anger or a public display of abuse. It’s takes a quick, private encounter to say, “Hey, stop what you’re doing.”

Now, obviously you can’t go around grabbing people’s throats every time you want to correct their mistakes. HR would have their hands full. Instead, take the concept of a quick, private correction and address what needs to be corrected in private.

When a team member or employee has pulled their weight and really contributed to the success of the project, let everyone know. This makes that person feel valued and will make others that see it want the same public approval which means they’ll work for it.

Defend your pack and they’ll have your back.

What separates the pack leader from the pack is the willingness to stand up and defend the pack at any moment. This is where most people fail to be their dog’s leader. Does your dog bark at the door bell, or run to the door every time someone comes by? It’s because they feel the need to protect your domain because you’re not giving them that sense of protection.

Again, not a lot of people think of themselves as their dog’s protector. Usually it’s the other way around. But then again, not a lot of people are their dog’s pack leader either. So this is why.

Diesel and I are on a walk. It’s late and we’re walking through a darker part of the neighborhood that isn’t well lit. We’re having a great time and in deep conversation. Diesel is at my side walking along side me when all of the sudden, out of nowhere, I see a dog running up to us. It’s dark and I have no idea what kind of dog it is. Instinct takes over and I put myself between Diesel (my dog-aggressive pitbull) and whatever it is that’s approaching. I put Diesel into a “sit” and stand in front of him with my chest stuck out. The approaching dog immediately stops in his tracks and goes back to his house. I turn around and praise Diesel for sitting still and we’re on our way.

By putting myself between my dog and whatever was coming toward us, it put Diesel at ease and said to him, “Sit tight. I’ll handle this. Don’t worry about a thing.” Couldn’t the same go for your team? Your people work so hard for you. It’s important for them to know that whenever something comes at them, that you’ll be there to defend them. That’s not to say that you need to coddle them; that they can’t stand up for themselves. It’s important for them to know that you’ll go to bat for them when you need to.

Be consistent.

Diesel and Armani knew they weren’t allowed onto my bed before I got in it. Once I was settled, they had to sit and be invited up. They didn’t just have free reign to jump up on the furniture. Because physical height is seen as power among dogs, it’s important that you control who gets that privilege. My dogs could sit on the couch, but they had to be invited by me before hand. If they weren’t, then they were pushed down.

Armani is very stubborn and a tad willful with this. He just wasn’t getting it that he has to sit before he can be invited onto my bed. He’d jump up on his own and I’d literally push him off immediately. He jumps up again, and I push him off. Again. And again. And again until he finally got tired of it. But he learned. And it was because I was consistent.

Be consistent with your employees. Make sure they know what to expect from you. It’s hard coming into work not knowing what your boss will be like. There’s a saying in advertising: “Consistent branding is effective branding.” I think the same can be said for employers. Be as consistent as possible and let your folks know what you expect of them and what they can expect of you.

Respect is earned.

As I mentioned before, it took a little while for my dogs to see me as their pack leader and gain their respect. It’s because I was respectful to them, I was consistent, I affirmed them when they were good and corrected them when they were bad, and I put myself between them and danger. They didn’t have any other choice but to relax and just enjoy being dogs.

As a leader, you can’t just walk into an office and command respect. You can command attention and demand that people do what you say, but go beyond that. Fight for your employees respect. Earn it. Invest in them and they’ll invest into the company. This is probably the hardest one to conquer, but the most rewarding both for you as a leader and for your company.

I no longer have Diesel and Armani. I had to give them up to move a few years back. I’ve been through a lot in the past five years and giving them up was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. The fact that they both went to the same person made it easier for me. I’ll always love them and am forever grateful for their lessons in leadership.

How did you learn leadership? What do you look for in a good leader?

She did and it was.

“Ok, give me 10 minutes and I’ll be back with the results.”

That was Monday. Day 4.

———-

I don’t get sick. Well, I haven’t in a long time. The last time I can remember getting THIS ill was back in College. I used to have severe seasonal allergies, but they went away after moving to Tennessee (which is strange because this where allergies come to kill people.)

The week leading to Day 1 I had been getting up early to workout and staying up late to work on extra curricular activities. I was juggling three part time jobs, wrapping up the writing for a short film that’s now in pre-production, and getting ready for a table read of my first feature-length screenplay.

“Just make it to Thursday,” I kept telling myself. I just needed to make it to the table read and then I’d have the weekend to recover.

Day 1 presented itself with a low-grade fever out of nowhere. I didn’t feel sick the night before. In fact, I went to bed feeling the best I had in a long time. “Courier Knew” got a very favorable reaction and I was happy. Yet something in my body said enough is enough.

I took 1,000mgs of Ibuprofen to shut it up so I could take my car into the shop to get fixed. The pain reliever worked and I thought the fever was just a fluke thing. Some minor bug that was squashed.

2:00 presented itself with insane body chills and body aches. I was in the middle of a screenwriting meeting with my co-writer and co-producer when it hit me again. It was 80 degrees outside. Being that I had all the doors and windows open, it was also 80 degrees inside. I wore a hoodie with the hood up and arms crossed. I was freezing.

My best friend Al said, “Ok we’re going to the Doctor.” I said, “I don’t go to the Doctor. Just pick me up some meds and I’ll be fine.” The chills got worse and I agreed to go.

In hindsight I should have agreed to take the flu test at the walk-in clinic the afternoon of Day 1. It was an extra $60 and the Nurse said, “all the test is going to do is tell us yes or no. The treatment is going to be the same: treat the symptoms.”  So continued to treat the wrong symptoms.

Days 2 and 3 went about the same. I kept a steady fever that would spike at night and in the afternoon. On Day 3 I started developing a cough that wouldn’t go away and had a fever of 103. I told myself that if I wasn’t feeling better by Day 4 that I would go to a doctor.

———-

Al and I are both sitting in the doctor’s room waiting for the flu test to come back positive. I’m trying not to cough up a lung.

“Well, you don’t have the flu. Your results came back negative. I’m going to pull in another doctor to listen to your lungs so we can figure out what this is.”

Another Doctor comes in, listens and send me to get a chest X-ray.

“Well, it looks like pneumonia.” “Oh good,” I said, relieved to know what it was. “Well, not really…” He proceeded to tell me how serious this was and had it not gone detected, the results would have been fatal. He lost me after “fatal.”

Now, I’m a pretty fearless, even-keeled guy. On a scale of 1-10 I barely get above a 3. I never get panicky or allow adrenaline to get the best of me. All of that went out the window the afternoon of Day 4. Fear that I hadn’t caught this in time, fear that I was going die… fear.

The fear followed us back to Al’s place where I had stayed the entire weekend. It had sent my fever to 104.5 by the time we had gotten home from the pharmacy. Fear continued to control my thoughts and sent me into a tailspin. My whole body shook with chills, face red with heat, ears ringing, vision blurring. Fear had spiked my temperature to 105.5.

With a body now full of titanic-grade antibiotics and other fever-reducing meds, the only thing I could do was pray. I prayed the whole way home and the entire evening. It wasn’t until I stopped focusing on the fear, and focusing on God that everything seemed to settle down. I sang just about every worship song I could think of and made the attention of my focus on Him and not this black, insidious fear that was literally trying to kill me. As soon as I did that my body relaxed. The chills stopped and the fever gradually came down.

I went to bed with a temperature of 97.6.

Days 5 and 6 were identical. Sleep and rest. I was only allowed to walk to the bathroom. Even walking to the bathroom made me tired and short of breath.

I do need to stop and say that I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for my best friend, Al. He took me into his home for 6 days and took two days off work to make sure I made it out of the woods alive and wasn’t eaten by the Fear Bear (why don’t those rhyme? They look like they should. I digress.) I may have been born an only child, but now I have a brother. Al, I cannot begin to thank you for everything you did for me those 6 days. I love you, man.

I’m on Day 7 and feeling better each day. I do hate not doing something. I’m an activator with achiever tendencies. I don’t do sit-on-the-couch-for-five-days. Although, I do like being alive and can see the bigger picture, so I’ll take these five days as a much-needed staycation.

Maybe now I can work on getting all my email addresses into one place and feel organized about those. That’s something I can do with my feet up.

Even STARBUCKS didn’t get back to me. Starbucks! And I’m a former employee. (I don’t understand it, either.)

I’ve heard it’s easier to get a job when you have a job. And from the look of it, and seeing my employed colleagues move onto new jobs, I can believe that.

To date, I have 164 emails in my “Job Applications” email folder. This contains both application notices and rejection emails.

This is not a pity post, or a plea for empathy. I honestly feel that I’m the closest I’ve been in a long time to doing what I’ve been created to do. And I wouldn’t be here (literally) if, say, Porter Novelli said “Yes.”

Just for fun, I’ve complied a list of everyone I can remember interviewing with and applying for. These are in no particular order:

Interviewed with:
Southwest Airlines Head Quarters
Nordstrom Head Quarters
Samaritan’s Purse Head Quarters
The National Partnership for Women and Families
Porter Novelli
Bates Creative Group
INM United
American Forest Foundation
Edelman/StrategyOne
World Hope, International
Relevant Magazine
Vineyard Vines Head Quarters
Crosspoint Community Church
Asurion Head Quarters

Applied to:
Warner Music Group
Jibe
Emma
Starbucks
Cirque du Soliel (how cool would THIS have been?)
TPAC
Schermerhorn Symphony Center
MTV
CMT
Thomas Nelson
Sony Music Group
Gaylord Entertainment
Dave Ramsey
HealthSpring
The Home Depot Head Quarters
DC Water & Sewer Authority
Twitter Head Quarters
Facebook Head Quarters
GAC
American University
RedPeg Marketing
Show Hope
Disney Imagineering (Social Media & Video Communications)
American Progress
ISEP
Living Social
Living Social Adventures
Nissan North America
Global Impact
Huge, Inc.
Halogen TV
American Public Health Association
Perkins Eastman
Jason Communications
NBC Universal
The Ellen Show
Maximum Impact Churches
Blackboard
Ketchum Washington
APCO Worldwide
CoStar Group
Paladin
MDB Communications
Forest Hill Church
CIRCA
Jaleo Crystal City
B-Reel
Creative Circle
AKQA
DDB Talent Management Group
Aquent
National Wildlife Federation
Doorways for Women and Families
Project Hope
Atlantic Media Company
Central Intelligence Agency (yes, even the CIA! – But I couldn’t tell anyone in case I actually got an interview)
USA Today
Intelsat
MarketArt
District of Columbia Public Schools
Home Builders Institute
The People’s Church, Spring Hill Campus
Discovery Channel

Wow… now there’s a list! And to everyone above I want to say thank you! Thank you for not hiring me. I feel more than ever that I’m closer to where I need to be in order to do what I’ve been created to do.

I’m producing two films first quarter, I’m screenwriting, I’m having a blast. Granted, I’m also waiting tables and dealing with some pretty crazy customers, but I’m the happiest I’ve been in two years! And it’s not about the money (clearly.) It’s about doing what I’m supposed to be doing. The money will follow. (I pray, dear God, that the money will follow.)

Some would look at a list this size and feel like a failure. I look at all those doors that didn’t open and then look at the ones that did and I’m encouraged.

Now, that’s not to say that I’m content to remain under-employed. I’m not. There’s a difference between being HAPPY and being CONTENT. I believe that happiness is a choice, and contentment is a catalyst. Am I content with where I am financially and professionally? Heavens no. Not at all. But am I happy? Yeah, sure. My discontentment drives me to create change and keep chasing certain lions.

Someone once said to me, “You’re like my husband. Never happy with what you’re doing.” And to that I say, “I’m VERY happy with what I’m doing. I’m the happiest I’ve been in two years. TWO YEARS! But I’m not content to stay this way.” That’s the difference.

So again. To everyone who told me “No” over the past few years, Thank you. For the ones who are going to say “Yes!” in the coming months, I say “Let’s do this.”

Celebrate Recovery Opening Sequence from Toby Sturgill on Vimeo.

Camera: Canon XF105 at 24 frames/second
Software: Final Cut Pro 7
Music: “The Healing Has Begun” by Matthew West.

The Ambassadors Design & Animation Showreel 2011 from The Ambassadors on Vimeo.

This is a great one coming from Feria Cinematic.

What are your thoughts? What’s the meaning? Is there a message?

Well I guess that feeling has always stayed the same because while I’m mostly super excited about this new production of NEWSIES I’m also a tad jealous that I wasn’t part of it. I mean, I’ve been carrying the banner since 1993, y’all.

I feel like this is going to sweep Broadway and be a hit for years. Like The Lion King or Wicked, NEWSIES is a classic story with a older-millennial cult following. So, while I’m over not being in this production, I am SUPER EXCITED that there are people out there who are just as super excited and “get” NEWSIES like I do.

After living a year in Northern Virginia and the DC Metro area, I’ve discovered that there really is no place like home. While I made some fantastic new friends and had some of the most memorable experiences I still couldn’t see myself in the DMV for much longer.

The time was right for me to leave Nashville a year ago and the time was right for me to return just last month. Over the course of that year I helped produce the Denver #filmcamp for Inside|Out Global and attended the Gideon Media Arts Conference and Film Festival.

The #filmcamp was a great success. We had 11 students in two teams who made “Speak Your Mind” and “leftovers.”

The Gideon was an amazing networking opportunity to meet like-minded filmmakers, writers and producers. Seeing as that’s the new career change, that’s what I’m focusing on: filmmaking.

Now with that comes a lot of dues. Most of said dues are paid by working for free on just about any production crew. I’m meeting as many people in film here as I can. I’m looking for opportunities to be on a crew, or be an extra on the production side. I’m starting to search for screenwriters and Executive Producers as well as getting the scripts I’ve written registered with the Writers Guild of America to ensure they’re protected before shopping them around.

The long-term goal is to produce feature-length films and tell great stories. As much as I’d like to jump in there and make that happen, I’m afraid there are quite a few steps between here and there. I’m looking for any opportunity to get my hands dirty and start generating content.

On the making-money-now front: I’m waiting tables at Bricktop’s in Coolsprings and am in negotiations with a social media company to fill a part time sales position with their company. That still leaves me with some time to pursue and produce film. Stories. Great stories.

So again, thanks for being with me on this journey. Check back from time to time to see what’s up. I’m working harder on making this a regular thing with more frequent updates. Be on the look out, too, for film-based content and a lot of talk about producing. I’ll still be posting about typography, design and social media, but will be focusing more on the film side of things.

Thanks for coming back!

Cheers.
-Toby